Zohar & Kavod of Parents
The זהר writes,
"Hashem removes the deceased parents from גן עדן and brings them with Him to participate in the שמחה (wedding) of their children."
It seems from the זהר that no invitation is necessary for them to attend. (Trust in Hashem to take care of it)
There is no מקור anywhere about inviting the deceased parents to the wedding.
Placing printed invitations (some with return cards) seems unnecessary.
Placing Kvitlach on top of קברי צדיקים was unknown to previous generations.
Harav Hagaon Reb Avrohom Ganichovski זצ"ל held that one may not place anything on top of a קבר for personal benefit.
Therefore, placing a Kvittel or an invitation on a קבר would be אסור
(Based on יו"ד שד״מ–שס"ח)
שמעתי בשם שר התורה הגרח״ק זצ״ל
Only for the benefit of the נפטר
On top of the standing מצבה would be OK
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